Being a step parent has incredible challenges that are uniquely available only in this kind of family. In order for a unique family to be whole you must able to balance love and respect with understanding and discipline.
This will help you in creating a family that is perfectly close despite of having their own individual imperfections. To better understand this, refer here at http://www.huffingtonpost.com/news/step-parenting/. Once a single mom with children vows to be with a single man with children also should be considered as a union of two big families combined as one. Each family has its own individual trait, in order for this union to work, each parents must create an effort in respecting each families’ uniqueness. In order for each family to be united both parents should create an extra effort in dealing with each other's differences.
The activity of each family is always different. That is why it is vital that you must come in terms with the idea that you have two different families inside the single house. How can this kind of relationship work? First you must always remember that your partner will always have a closer relationship to his kinds than to you own. Remember that if you always fight with your partner's children, you are slowly starting the end.
Blood ties is always going to win over the relationship. This may change as time goes by because there will reach a point where you may develop a tie closer to your step children like your own, this will come in due time and can only occur in a healthy family environment.
How to be a Good Stepfather would be to respect the rules that your better half's family established. There will have a chance that your step children will rebel against you if you try to impose rules that are far from what they have. This situation entails the children to use the love of their own parents/parent against you. You may say that you are an adult and that you have stronger power than them but never underestimate the capacity of a child. Possibly try to agree with each other by compromising in parenting styles. In disciplining situations, always allow your partner to handle the situation, and attend to your own personal matter. In disciplining his/her own children, do not join in be an observer, for this will refrain from the child to feel that he/she has been ganged by two adults. This may seem negative but always expect that your step children will hate you.
It is possible that disregarding the story of your partnership, there is still a possibility that step children may hate you because they blame you for all that had happened. This is not unusual in a child's behavior since this has been influenced by the enclosed perspective and understanding of an adult relationship. Make it clear to the child that you are in no way replacing the his/her lost parents. Accept the role that in the child's eye, you may possibly be never considered as more than an aunt. Once your step child begins to have a smooth relationship with you, he/he may feel confusion since that may entail betrayal to his/her mom/dad.
Learn to accept such possibilities. Make an effort in creating fun and memorable bonding experience. Based from the site at supportforstepdads.com, the biggest problem that a blended family possess is the needs that each possess. Always be frank when it comes to dealing with your needs. The most vital in step parenting is for you to strive and be more understanding, compassionate, humane and insightful. Always focus on the area which will make you grow as a parent and a human being because your children and your step children will just follow your lead.